that tonight's gonna be a good, good night! Oooo Ooooo, I got my letter yesterday! So, I've been singing the Black Eyed Peas all night and all morning. I'm so happy! I faxed the letter to the surgeon's office this morning, next week I can start all my pre op stuff and schedule the surgery.
I have such a peaceful feeling right now. I'm doing the happy dance on the inside. Ahhh, life is good, I'm ready for this change, I'm ready to have a fighting chance at taking this weight off for good. And, on top of all that....it's Friday! Yaaaayyyy! Happy, happy weekend.
Hugs.
Tess
Friday, March 12, 2010
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
I did not get the letter yesterday.
And my patience is wearing thin. I want my letter! That was my rant for the day. Aside from not having my letter, I'm darn happy. I'm thrilled to know that I should indeed have the approval letter in my hand this week. I'm thrilled to know that soon I will have a definite date and be on my way to band land.
I have been reading lots of blogs and lately have seen a few posts about the decision to tell or not to tell about the band. Band Groupie's post was really a great read and made me chuckle. I have already told just about anyone who will listen, including perfect strangers about my intent to get the lap band. I never really gave much thought to not telling. Anyone who knows me knows the struggle I have had with my weight. I really could give a rat's hiney if someone thinks it's a bad decision or not. When I told my sister-in-law that I wanted to have the surgery, she started to make a comment and I could tell by her expression it wasn't going to be positive, so I just stopped her and said "I've made up my mind, this is a decision that is best for me, If what you are about to say is not nice or supportive, please don't share." And so, she did not share. Other than that, everyone I have discussed it with has been more than supportive.
One of my problems in my life is that I have not always been good at asking for the help and support that I need. But with middle age, a little bit of wisdom has come as well and I find that when I do speak up and ask for what I need, I generally get it. Life is good. I am loved and have people in my life that I love right back. I'm ready to enjoy my good life from a healthier body. I really am ready!
Hugs.
Tess
I have been reading lots of blogs and lately have seen a few posts about the decision to tell or not to tell about the band. Band Groupie's post was really a great read and made me chuckle. I have already told just about anyone who will listen, including perfect strangers about my intent to get the lap band. I never really gave much thought to not telling. Anyone who knows me knows the struggle I have had with my weight. I really could give a rat's hiney if someone thinks it's a bad decision or not. When I told my sister-in-law that I wanted to have the surgery, she started to make a comment and I could tell by her expression it wasn't going to be positive, so I just stopped her and said "I've made up my mind, this is a decision that is best for me, If what you are about to say is not nice or supportive, please don't share." And so, she did not share. Other than that, everyone I have discussed it with has been more than supportive.
One of my problems in my life is that I have not always been good at asking for the help and support that I need. But with middle age, a little bit of wisdom has come as well and I find that when I do speak up and ask for what I need, I generally get it. Life is good. I am loved and have people in my life that I love right back. I'm ready to enjoy my good life from a healthier body. I really am ready!
Hugs.
Tess
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Holy cannoli!!
17 comments in one day! You guys are awesome. Thank you so much for reading my blog, for taking the time to share your thoughts and encouragement with me and.....for sharing your experiences with me. I am indeed fortunate to have found this wonderful community of people all reaching for the same goals. You have all been so inspiring and provided me with a wealth of information about the lap band. I am so happy, I can't keep my butt in the chair. Again, from the bottom of my heart. Thank you all so much for your kindness.
Hugs!
Tess
Hugs!
Tess
Monday, March 8, 2010
My heart is pounding!
OMG!!! I just got of the phone with my insurance......guess what!
The approval letter was mailed on Friday, I should have it in my hand
in the next couple of days and then.....I can get a DATE!!!
I'm so excited. I can hardly breathe. Wow, and thank you to the folks
who nominated me for a Sunshine Award, you guys are the best. I
promise to get that done in the next couple of days. I'm really busy at
work, but things should slow down by the end of the week.
Have a wonderful week, I hope to have a date to report very soon. I'm
so lucky that I have you guys to share with, you are so supportive and
inspirational!
Hugs!
Tess
The approval letter was mailed on Friday, I should have it in my hand
in the next couple of days and then.....I can get a DATE!!!
I'm so excited. I can hardly breathe. Wow, and thank you to the folks
who nominated me for a Sunshine Award, you guys are the best. I
promise to get that done in the next couple of days. I'm really busy at
work, but things should slow down by the end of the week.
Have a wonderful week, I hope to have a date to report very soon. I'm
so lucky that I have you guys to share with, you are so supportive and
inspirational!
Hugs!
Tess
Friday, March 5, 2010
Friday ramblings
Well, happy Friday everyone. Today is an exciting day for me. My oldest son has his first High School track meet today. He is a Freshman and was a real stand out in track in middle school and has been asked to run on the varsity team. I'm nervous and excited for him. My youngest son is in the 7th grade, he is an incredible guitarist and artist. My boys are really exceptional young people. I'm always impressed with the accomplishments that they have made. It makes me a little sad though, to know that my kids have never seen me as anything but overweight. Of course they've seen me in varying degrees of fat, but always...overweight. In high school, I was a runner. I ran on the cross country team and would lose myself in running. I still have the mind of a runner, just the ass of an old fatty! I have great cardiovascular strength for a woman my size and can really go long and hard on the elliptical, but to run, is well, not pretty and not good on my joints. My oldest son and I work out at the gym together sometimes and he always says one day he wants me to run with him. I always say, when I loose a hundred pounds, I'll run a race with you. So, that is one of my goals, when I loose 100 pounds I will run a 5K with my son.
That's something to really look forward to.
Have a great weekend guys, and thanks for reading.
Hugs!
That's something to really look forward to.
Have a great weekend guys, and thanks for reading.
Hugs!
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Wednesday has been very, very good to me!
I love Wednesdays. I used to hate Wednesday. When I first divorced, every Wednesday my boys would go to their dad's house. It was so hard for me. I was lonely and didn't know what to do with the time alone. So, after a while, I decided that Wednesday would be my day to do whatever I wanted to do. I could get my nails done, go out with friends for a cocktail, rent a movie. Wednesday was my day. Now, 6 years after my divorce and 3 years into my second marriage, Wednesday is still a great day, it's date night for my husband and me. Every Wednesday, we get home from work, and go to our favorite bar/grill. We have dinner and cocktails, catch up with our friends and just be a couple without talking about what the kids need from us. It's just a really nice night. So.....happy Wednesday everyone, and thanks for all of your support!
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Inspired by other posts.
Well today I was catching up on all the blogs I follow and found a common theme in several.
These blogs in particular caught my eye:
http://jenslapbandjourney.blogspot.com/
http://mommyisshrinking.blogspot.com/
http://livinglargeincc.blogspot.com/
These blogs all touched on why people overeat.
It all got me thinking. It is no secret that I have spent a lot of time in therapy. I feel like I have made some strides in my life. There are areas of my life that I enjoy great success in. I have a wonderful family, a great marriage to a respectful, good man, a beautiful home, a fulfilling career. I take great pride in the achievements that I have made. But I still have this albatross around my neck. This albatross is my relationship with food. I do know through years of therapy and soul searching that my relationship with food is completely intertwined in my thought process, in everything that I do.
I remember being a very little girl when I first starting using food to comfort myself. I was 5 when my dad had his first heart attack and 6 when my mom was diagnosed with cancer. I was afraid and anxious alot. I remember way back then comforting myself with food, totally losing myself in a bag of chips or a candy bar. I remember realizing that I didn't think of anything bad the whole time I was eating those chips. It is way back then that these bad habits began. I was not a fat child and did not start gaining weight until I was 25, but the cycle of binge eating and guilt had a very strong hold on me already.
So now, suffice to say, I have somewhat better coping skills then I did at 5 or 6 years old. I have done a great deal of work identifying the feelings that compel me to eat. Why is it then, that knowing and doing are so far from one another? Why is it that when I remember all of the happy moments of my childhood, I think of food? I think of mom preparing the food, and everyone enjoying the food as a family. Food is my best friend and my worst enemy all rolled into one.
When I read on blogs that people no longer obsess about food, I just want to scream! Can that ever happen for me? Will this band really give me the freedom to live life like a normal person? I have friends who are naturally thin and they just don't wake up thinking about what they will eat. They don't sit down to dinner and start discussing what they will have for the next meal. I want so badly to know what it feels like to be free from my compulsion to overeat.
These blogs in particular caught my eye:
http://jenslapbandjourney.blogspot.com/
http://mommyisshrinking.blogspot.com/
http://livinglargeincc.blogspot.com/
These blogs all touched on why people overeat.
It all got me thinking. It is no secret that I have spent a lot of time in therapy. I feel like I have made some strides in my life. There are areas of my life that I enjoy great success in. I have a wonderful family, a great marriage to a respectful, good man, a beautiful home, a fulfilling career. I take great pride in the achievements that I have made. But I still have this albatross around my neck. This albatross is my relationship with food. I do know through years of therapy and soul searching that my relationship with food is completely intertwined in my thought process, in everything that I do.
I remember being a very little girl when I first starting using food to comfort myself. I was 5 when my dad had his first heart attack and 6 when my mom was diagnosed with cancer. I was afraid and anxious alot. I remember way back then comforting myself with food, totally losing myself in a bag of chips or a candy bar. I remember realizing that I didn't think of anything bad the whole time I was eating those chips. It is way back then that these bad habits began. I was not a fat child and did not start gaining weight until I was 25, but the cycle of binge eating and guilt had a very strong hold on me already.
So now, suffice to say, I have somewhat better coping skills then I did at 5 or 6 years old. I have done a great deal of work identifying the feelings that compel me to eat. Why is it then, that knowing and doing are so far from one another? Why is it that when I remember all of the happy moments of my childhood, I think of food? I think of mom preparing the food, and everyone enjoying the food as a family. Food is my best friend and my worst enemy all rolled into one.
When I read on blogs that people no longer obsess about food, I just want to scream! Can that ever happen for me? Will this band really give me the freedom to live life like a normal person? I have friends who are naturally thin and they just don't wake up thinking about what they will eat. They don't sit down to dinner and start discussing what they will have for the next meal. I want so badly to know what it feels like to be free from my compulsion to overeat.
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