Hey there, happy Thursday. I hope all is going well with you. Thanks for your sweet comments on my pity post about my phone and all. And Kristin, yes I'm up for a challenge, I think that's a great idea, I'll message you on FB.
Now...on to an interesting topic. I have struggled with my band a lot over the past year, being too tight, too loose and then tight again. It's been 9 months since I had an adjustment and most of the time I think my fill level is just right, I am the issue. I always was one to push the limits. I do this with my band too. I don't particularly like this about myself, but I must be honest and say that when I have an issue, 9 times out of 10, it could have been avoided, if I had been more careful or more mindful of my band and it's nuances. Anyway, last year I had to get a little unfill because I was really struggling....I looked back on my blog trying to find a time-line of things and I was shocked by how long I had let things go being way to tight. I then read my post about the unfill and the sheer excitement I felt being able to eat and drink, and how much better I felt immediately after eating real food. Right after I got that unfill I went to the Dr. for my yearly blood work and found out that I was B-12 deficient and anemic. I know that at that time I was not getting the proper nutrition, I wasn't really taking my vitamins either, because it was such a struggle to take medicine. This year I went for my yearly blood work and everything was good, I was a little deficient in vitamin D, but everything else was great. I'm taking a long time to explain all this, but anyway....I was malnourished. About 7 months ago I noticed this divot in my thumbnail right at the quick it was a a horizontal crater looking area and I thought maybe I had jammed my nail and didn't realize it. But now that it's grown out, I realized that there is a horizontal divot on all of my fingernails in the exact same place. When I went for my blood work, I showed my Dr. he said they are called Beau's lines and they are an indication of trauma to the body, like if I had a Scarlet Fever or a heart attack or took chemo therapy. Obviously that has not happened, he said it also shows up in people with malnutrition. Hmmmm. My nails are looking healthy now, but here is a picture of one of them and you can see the Beau's line that will soon make it to the end of my nail.
I was really shocked by this. I was especially shocked that I could be malnourished and not lose any weight at the time. I really do care about my health. When I got the lapband, I did it as much for my health as I did to look better and feel better about myself. I remember reading blog after blog while I was researching the band and when I read about people who were obviously not doing what was best for them, I was judgmental and I thought to myself..."I'll never be one of those people, I would never throw up and then try to eat again....I would never eat bread if I knew it would make me sick...I would never do this, or do that." Well, well, well, after 2 years, I have to honestly say that I've done just about everything that I thought I wouldn't do. I have let my food addiction rule me and I have made choices that were not in my own best interest. I've started reading some of my old posts, trying to get a feel for the way I was feeling back then, the honeymoon is definitely over, but I am still in love with my band. It's just time to re-affirm our vows, or something of the sort. I saw the interview with the David the 650 pound virgin who lost so much weight and has now put on 250 pounds again. I see myself in him, I can't imagine where I would be if I hadn't had WLS. It's just so easy to fall back into old habits. I had my yearly lady doc appointment today and when I weighed in, it was 210, that's 5 pounds above my lowest since banding. I can do better than this. I need to do better than this I want to lose at the very least 30 pounds before my 50th birthday. In order to do that I need to eat better foods. I need protein in my diet, I have never done protein powders because I thought I should be able to get the protein in my regular diet. I'm thinking I should try it for a while. So, I'll take suggestions from anyone who has a favorite. So, there you have it in a nut shell...I've been hanging out at the same darn weight for about a year, I've not been treating my body well and it's time that I make some changes. You read it here first folks.
I'll leave you with a cute picture of me and my boys from Easter Sunday. The river behind me is denial! Have a great day!