Thursday, July 14, 2011

Thank you Jen! I'm going for it!

Okay, after reading Jen's post about her de-fill, or un-fill if you like, I was even more confused than I have been. I've been struggling with tightness and PBing and pain when I eat for a while now. But I've never gotten an unfill because I've been too scared to gain weight. It would appear that Jen and I have been in the same boat for a while. She's been in it for 17 months, me just for a few months. I have only had 2 fills, I have 3.5 cc's in a 10 cc band. I got my last fill in October, so that's been 9 months. In that time, I haven't lost much weight at all. At first my fill was just right, in fact I proclaimed the green zone once or twice. But about 4 months ago, my band started getting tighter. I get tight at TOM and with hormonal fluctuations, I also get tight with stress. So, when I get tight, and PB and have multiple stuck episodes, it's disheartening and I feel like I gravitate to bad foods because at least I know I can eat them. There are times though that my band seems fine, that I can eat comfortably so that 's what's been keeping me from getting an unfill. I'm scared. I get panicky when I think about how it could be if I can eat freely. Yesterday I called Jen for some advice. She told me that she was feeling the exact same way and that after her unfill she can finally eat without pain and fear and that she is eating good solid protein and feeling satisfied. I have an appointment for Tuesday with my surgeon and I'm going to get some out. Yesterday was one of the worst days I've had since banding. I got up and got stuck on my coffee, all day I was stuck and puking, stuck on oatmeal, mashed potatoes, water, I puked so much yesterday. So, to say I was hungry, weak and crabby is an understatement. Yesterday half way through the work day I had a milk shake because I was so shaky. I'm scared to get an unfill, but I'm also scared to keep going this tight. I hope my doc will just take 1/2 cc out for me. I was dehydrated yesterday and in the evening when my band loosened up a bit I drank plenty of water to catch up, I woke up at 11:30 last night to pee and without thinking, I grabbed my water and took a sip. Stuck, so for 30 minutes I was yakking up water so that I could lay back down and get some sleep. Something has to give, I don't want to hurt my band or me for that matter. I definitely think I'm in the red zone after reading the description that Amy W. had posted last week.

I hope you all have a great weekend. I'm looking forward to it, although I will be busy, rehearsal tonight and Sunday we move the set. I get my kids back today, I sure do miss them! Y'all have a good one!
Big Hugs,
T

14 comments:

Sandy said...

I was in the same boat. Same stucks and only able to eat sliders/liquids. Had 0.5 cc taken out in early March and it was the best thing I ever did. After a month they started putting tiny little amounts in til I was back to 4.4 cc. Last week I had another 0.1 cc put in and I can still eat anything. It's such a good feeling to be able to eat solids. In the last four months I haven't been stuck or PB'ed or anything. I truly believe the "rest" was the best thing for me. I'm convinced that a bit of my stomach had pushed up through the band sort of like a hiatus hernia. By relieving the pressure it smoothed things out. Now I'm ready to move on and get some more weight off. I'm the same weight as last year at this time. Go for it and don't be afraid. Remember, they can always put more back in. I blamed flying for causing the problems and I still believe that is the reason. I am flying to Europe in October and already plan to have a small de-fill/un-fill before going. But not all the fluid, just a bit to make things easier while away. Blessed relief is on it's way.

Steph said...

I'm glad to know you are goign to be feeling some relief soon. When i flew up to Tennessee at the 4th of july, it was my TOM and flying always makes me tight, so I was miserable for 4 days. Now, i've decided anytime I fly, I am going to get a small unfill, as I couldn't live that way. I'm glad you will be doing better soon. Too tight is never good!

Jen said...

I am so glad you are going in. You won't regret it. I feel like I'm back in the game and just a few days after my unfill I can say without a doubt that having one is nothing to worry about. I'm not starving, small portions still keep me full (for long time!) and I'm not even craving crap and it's the week before my TOM. That's saying something.
I will add that If you can't get water down (or your coffee) that you should make them get you in TODAY. That, to me, is an 'emergency' situation. They should be able to fit you in. You can't go all weekend like that.
Wish I was there to go with you.

vickyd said...

You're making the right decision. I know it is scary but in the end you will be able to eat healthier food and will feel better physically. Good luck!

Pamela E. Williams said...

Awww Tessie!! I'm so sorry to read this. I'm glad as well that you are going in. To feel miserable that long can't be good. I've never been too tight and am even contemplating a fill, but dang if I get to where you are, shoot!! I've had 4 fills and am thinking I'm in the yellow zone although I thought once like you I was in the green zone. Take care.

(((HUGGGS)))

Shannon said...

you know I have been kinda having the same issues just not as severe. thanks for posting about this. I might have to get checked out.

Jacquie said...

I'm so happy you have made this decision T! It's been going on too long. You'll see how much better you feel and when you are getting proper nutrition. When are you going in?

Rhonda said...

Good luck! I hope the de-fill does wonders for you. :)

Jess said...

I can't imagine getting stuck on liquids and mushies! That is awful! You def need an un-fill!

Good luck!

Beth Ann said...

I'm so glad you that you are going to get some relief! Being tight is horrible and you have had to deal with it long enough. You will feel SO much better!

Joey said...

It's hard to make the decision, but well worth it. Fingers crossed! XOXO!

Read said...

I totally get why you're nervous about getting some out - but seriously! They can put it back in if need be. You absolutely need some relief - this is not an okay way to live your life. You're worth way more than that!!!

#fatfreefloozy said...

I have 9.25mls in a 10ml band and just had 0.25 taken out and the difference is just amazing. Yet - 9mls was way too little restriction. Remember, it is nice to lose weight fast, but I have had friends lose their hair and rot their teeth through having their bands too tight! Ewk!

MandaPanda said...

Posts like this are so important! The band is not supposed to keep you from eating! It's supposed to keep you fuller, longer. That's it. I hope this unfill provides some relief.