Especially when it's love...of....Chocolate! I didn't even buy any Halloween candy. I was that lady, blinds pulled tight, porch light off, hiding in the shadows, keeping that devil chocolate out of my house. But then, it happened like it often does, the inner beast, it taunts me..."Oh, honey, you didn't have any chocolate for Halloween, you were so good...reward yourself!" So, I bought chocolate. I brought it to work around all the hungry, burly men, I shared, but not before I ate more chocolate than I've had in a long time. It hurt...a lot! Last night I lay in bed an ache in my gut that reminded me why I'm so glad I don't overeat everyday of my life anymore. I lay there, reminiscing about that time, when, if I had bought chocolate, I would not have shared, I would not have eaten it in front of anyone, I would have eaten it all and wanted more, I would have gone to bed, ashamed, feeling poorly, but only to get up and do it again. Since I've been lacking in motivation lately and feeling a bit down on myself lately, feeling like a failure because I've been maintaining, rather than losing. I haven't taken the time to appreciate all that my band has done for me. So, Pearl (my band)...thanks for all you've done for me. I appreciate you and I'm so glad I have you in my life. I'm sorry I don't always treat you with the respect you deserve, but today, I'm going to take a little time and reflect on what life would be like without you and take the steps to get back on the right track. Maintenance is good, very good, but I've got a ways to go...so it's time to step up.
Have a great day, big hugs,
T
14 comments:
I like that you were able to reflect it shows how much you have healed and how far you have come in this journey!
Bravo!
I know what you mean about overeating and the belly aches. It could have been all the sugar! I know when I had a piece of pecan pie last month, I was sick to my stomach for about 2 hours after eating it... and I know it was good, just not used to that much sugar anymore. :)
You are not a failure...being able to maintain when you're not motivated is a HUGE accomplishment!!
Oh, hell no. You are no failure. You can't be. Because I am. I straight up catapulted off the healthy train and landed in a sprinkle covered donut hole. With chocolate frosting. I've gained. I've failed.
But!!! No excuses, step right back on the healthy train and get back to work. At least you didn't gain. That's noteworthy.
Yep! I had one of those epiphanies myself this week...I <3 my band
I feel your pain..I should have been that house!!
xxxooo
I had cake yesterday for our firm's 15 year celebration - first cake in 4 months... I only cheated because it was amazing but the afternoon was not so amazing... neither was this a.m. Lesson learned.
Hey I say be that house as long as the light is off lol... We had so many houses with the lights on that didn't answer the door!
Mmmmm....chocolate...
Great reflection on how far you've come ... I want to be that person ... thanks for the honesty :)
chocolate is the devil. i'm sure of it. and our hormones are servants of it!!
Good for you for recognizing how far you've come and realizing your journey isn't over. Good luck!
You have definitely come so far!
Chocolate is fabulous. And evil. Sigh.
But I love that your attitude toward how you eat it has changed. That's a victory.
Great post!! And what an amazing NSV that was on the chocolate. No secret-eating, and you didn't get up and do it all over again the next day. THAT, my friend, is some serious progress! :) xoxo
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