Wednesday, December 22, 2010

8,760 hours ago...

My how things have changed in a year. I just read an old post from a year ago and I can't believe the change in me in one year. Sure, there have been some physical changes, but the emotional and mental changes are what I am most proud of right now. Just a year ago, I felt powerless when it came to my food issues. Last year at this time I was really dreading Christmas, because it represented another day of uncontrollable eating for me. The holidays were filled with cookies, pies, all things decadent and then followed with a giant helping of remorse. The cycle I was in was so painful and so destructive, but I just couldn't seam to get myself out of it. When I read that post, I can say that I remember how kind everyone in this community was to me, how much support and understanding I got from everyone and how I felt (although I was afraid to say it) a glimmer of hope. I remember playing out in my head what it would be like to have the surgery, what my life would be like. One of my biggest fears was giving up my way of life, I was so dependent on food for comfort. I remember reading one of Catherine's post about her friend saying to her before surgery, if you really want to change things, you're going to really have to change things... so simple and so true. The way my life was last year was not working for me. As scary as it was, I'm thankful beyond expression for this change in my life. I no longer feel hopeless or helpless. I feel quite empowered, and I feel like I will get to my goal weight and I will stay there, what a blessing.
Thank you all for the part you have played in both my decision to have WLS and my ability to be successful. At this wonderful time of year I'm so thankful for the second chance that I have been given and for the wonderful friends I've made along the way. Merry Christmas!
Big Hugs,
T

PS
Did I mention I finished my Christmas shopping yesterday?!?!

10 comments:

Stephanie M. said...

I can so relate! I was scared that once I had surgery, my life was going to become miserable, and what would I do without tons of pasta, rice, bread, cookies, etc. It is TOTALLY the opposite of that..life is grand! I don't feel like I am tied down by food and eating anymore. I can have a bit and move on. I ate ONE cookie off the cookie platter yesterday. ONE. That's crazy. That's only the second cookie I've had this entire month. Then today I came into the office and there was a fruit platter and I was THRILLED! So yeah...I understand. Oh, and congrats on finishing the shopping. :-)

~Lisa~ said...

A beautiful post - thank you! You're an inspiration to those of us who are "bandless" and trying hard to get through the holidays!

Merry Christmas!!

LDswims said...

What a great post! It's funny, I read my blog from this day last year and I was so hopeful of being banded that I couldn't think of anything else. Last year's theme was I want to be done with work "this week" because I was bored and was daydreaming about the band. This year...I'm ready to be done with work this week because I am ready to live! What a difference a year makes, eh?

Merry Christmas!!

Anonymous said...

Nice post. I am so happy for you, Theresa. You deserve the best and I think you and I are 2 lucky ladies! I hope to see you next year!

Cindylew said...

Merry Christmas lollipop and a happy New Year.
A new year for a new you.

Camille said...

I had my first surgeon visit this month and I honestly don't know what made me go and made me follow through with surgery, but I am so much better for it. As you so eloquently put, the change is both physical and emotional. Thanks so much for your wonderful blog. Congrats on catching up on shopping, and MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

Nicole said...

isn't it amazing how much we can change in a year?!

Pamela E. Williams said...

All I can say is thank you!!

oh and

Merry Christmas!!!

Lap Band Gal said...

Nice post, Merry Christmas!

Bonnie said...

Congrats on finishing your shopping. I did well myself this year. My hubby and I actually got most of our wrapping done so we won't be up until all hours of the night tomorrow - we can have a relaxing Christmas Eve. As you've probably read, I've had some struggles and wish I was losing more quickly, but at least I'm not gaining - which I always did over the holidays. Congrats on your successful year.