Monday, January 3, 2011

I can't handle the truth!


I'm sweating and I have tears rolling down my face. I have to say that I'm more afraid of my husband knowing my weight than anyone else. I know that's stupid. He loves me as I am and he's loved me much larger than I am. Anyway, I'm just going to bite the bullet and put it out there. I think it's important for me to do things differently this time, so ...I weigh 216. My pre- surgery weight was 266 and that was not my heaviest. Okay, I didn't die. This is a huge step for me. Thank you for your kindness to me and for encouraging me to take this step and for saying that you support me either way. My weight has been such a source of shame for me, so this is one step in breaking the cycle of secrecy and shame. It is what it is.
Big Hugs!
T

23 comments:

Sandy said...

Bravo! Surprising, but I now tell everyone what I weigh. It just pops out. And no one has freaked out. In fact a few have said I weigh less than them. I am now a few pounds less than my DH. It was more of a goal to hit that than any other goal. Go figure.

Joey said...

Yay! Take the power away from that number!

Rachel said...

If that is the biggest secret you have to hide in your life you are in good shape...I agree with Joey...you just deflated the shaming power of the number by being open.

Jacquie said...

Good for you T! I thought the earth would crack open and I'd fall in if Steve knew my weight but guess what? It didn't!

We each got a great one the second time around!

-Grace- said...

*HUGS* I'm with Joey---you have taken some of its power away! GOOD JOB!

Jen said...

WE ARE WEIGHT TWINS! :) Love you GF! Hugs and Sloppy Kisses!

Lonicera said...

I still hate saying my weight, but I do (now) because, as I keep saying to myself like a mantra "this time it's different". And as I also said in my last post, if we keep blogging about it between bandits we can all help each other, rather than skating round it or staying in the shadows. Bravo Tessierose!
Caroline

Maria said...

Bravo, Tess!!!! You did good!

Cindylew said...

OMG...I promise you this will be the most freeing thing you've ever done. You've just uncomplicated your life beyond your wildest dreams.
Congrats mama bear.

Nicole said...

Be proud of your weight loss!! No more reason to be ashamed.

uh said...

My husband is also my best friend & while I am open & honest in my blog of my weight, I still cannot say it to him. We women be crazzy! lol

Amanda M. said...

It was hard for me to post my weight when I first started my blog. But I figure that I won't be at that weight for long, so I might as well do it! You're doing great! Keep it up! :)

Camille said...

Ahhhhh. Didn't that feel good. I have a really hard time saying my weight out loud too. I started at 299 and now weigh 222. I feel better already.

Steph said...

Congrats on coming out of the weight closet!!! Say it loud, say it proud! You have worked hard and are fabulous!!

Sarah said...

There's no shame in the number - it is what it is. You know you'll never see it again, so be proud, you are doing great.

~Lisa~ said...

Bravo T!! I'm so proud of YOU!!! It is about time we stop allowing these numbers to define who we are - and you just took a HUGE step to freedom! You have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of, you're an incredibly beautiful woman, and a number is a number!!

Way to GO!!! (((hugssss)))

Tina said...

i cried when I stepped on the scale and saw it shot around up to 304. I hid that information like a dirty secret. Funnily enough it was only my husband and doctor who knew. When I got close to weighing the same as he did he even started sweating a little and dieted for a short time...now that there is some distance between our weights..well I tell everyone. Never in my life did I reveal my weight to strangers or even friends before now!

xxxooo

Sam said...

Feel free and light with all that weight no longer on your shoulders :o)

Sharing it with others makes it feel like nothing and makes it a lot easier to get rid of it for good :o)

Kiki said...

That's very brave of you. I know my weight, but to this day I still get weighed at the dr's office backwards. I ask that they don't tell me. I don't want to hear it. I will later check my on-line record when I'm ready to see the number. There's just something very scary about that number (whatever it happens to be) because so much baggage is tied up in it. I'm proud of you for sharing. At least you know in this community there's no judging! Great job on your progress by the way!

Kristin said...

Good job, Theresa! I think talking about your actual weight is like anything else; the more you do it, the easier it gets.

Andrew said...

Well done ... The weight LOSS is most significant in the numbers you have posted , not the weight itself......50 lbs :-)

Anonymous said...

Hey, now you can tell that weight to kiss your little ass! I am very happy for you, Theresa!

Sherry said...

Sweetie, remember my post about that? I'm under 200 by quite a bit now and STILL REFUSE to tell my DH how much I weigh. When I went in for surgery I made him leave the room when they weighed me. When I pushed out my baby, I made him promise not to look at the chart that showed my weight. I'm totally in the closet and I don't even see the light.