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Wednesday, February 23, 2011

The man in the shed...

Many of you follow my husband's blog , so I don't have to tell you that he's a funny guy. His blog today about the Man Shed was particularly funny to me, especially when he commented on my subtle hints when he spends too much time in his shed. He is a good man and a wonderful husband to me, even when I'm all Lifetime televisioned up with the drama. And I know that he needs his space, on most days I'm glad he has a place to go and unwind. One of the things about John is that he is very good at articulating his feelings, I mean for a man, and he has helped me in that area as well. I was married to a really needy man before and John is anything but that. My ex couldn't do anything with out consulting with me first. When I married John, I mistook his manly ways for aloofness. I felt that since he wasn't following me everywhere, that he must not love me. When in fact he loves me enough to let me become the person that I want to be. He encourages me to do theatre projects,the variety show I do in the summer, even if it's a logistics nightmare with all of our kids, he encourages me to explore my artistic talents and he's proud of me when I do my thing.

When I fell in love with John, I had never experienced a mature love before, not one that was based on respect and mutual admiration. I was in a very broken marriage and so I spent the greater part of the first half of my marriage to John, second guessing him and waiting for the other shoe to fall. I spent a lot of time and money on therapy trying to heal some of my brokenness so that I wouldn't lose this second chance that I'd been given.

The man is infinitely more patient with me than I am with him. When I talk to him about something that's bothering me, he doesn't get defensive, he listens before he talks (unlike his wife!) We have only been married for four years, but I can't imagine being married to anyone else. I feel like we've been together forever. That's the way it should be. I'm a lucky woman.

Big Hugs!
T

21 comments:

Joey said...

Awwwwww......

Carmen said...

BARF!
jk very sweet and very inspiring for us nonmarried single ladies :-)

Stephanie said...

I am so happy that you found happiness the second time around. It was that same way with my mom...Your husband is funny and seems like a perfectmatch for you. It's a lovely thing to read how you two love each other :)

Shannon said...

isn't love grand :D

Jacquie said...

Actually, T, I think you are both very lucky! I am so lucky to have found you through your blog and I am so looking forward to reading Johns as well. He is very funny and right on with his topics.

Miss Vickie "The Queen Bee" said...

Funny, when I married John, I was so nervous that I would piss him off and he would leave me! It took many years and therapy for me to realize he loves me for me. Not what I can do for him..( I had to wait on my first husband hand and foot ). I feel very blessed too. Nice post, T.

Susan said...

Great post! You are both very lucky to have found eachother!

kagead said...

Beautiful post! You two are lucky to have each other. :)

I'm Listening! said...

I gotta meet this dude!
Seriously, we need to stop with the mushy stuff now. I'm down to the last two check marks on my man card and people are gonna think we're just plain weird.

Banded Mommy (Angie) said...

/|\ I think this makes you an even BIGGER man!
| and the marks on your man card just doubled!

The love that you have for each other is very hard to find. Hold on to it forever!
Great post!

amandakiska said...

You are both lucky!

Read said...

What a lovely post - as I just said on John's blog about his love letter to you - you rock!!!

Lee Ann said...

Oh how sweeeeeeet. I'm so happy for both of you to have found each other. :)

MLM said...

so sweet and wonderful...

Barbara said...

Your post made me cry... I am really happy for both of you. hugs.

Tina said...

what an awesome post. I am also in a second marriage...I totally can relate to your having to learn to not react or act as you did with your first husband. Oh man...such a problem of mine.

You guys are both Awesome! :) Tell him he needs to be careful or he is going to have to go to BOOBS. :)

xxxooo

Kristin said...

You are John are lucky to have each other. The best part is, you both know it. That, my friend, is priceless.

Thanks for your comment today - you raised me up, you really did. I knew from the minute I met you that I liked you!

Camille said...

Will you guys please move next door to me? I love you both!

Jess said...

Aww that's sweet!

Bonnie said...

So glad you found a keeper.

Drazil said...

You deserve a love like this and I'm glad you have it!